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The Gospel According to Brawn

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Chapter 2Edit

Verses 1-12Edit

1 On the third day of Bulktober there was a feast at Cana in Galilift, and the mother of Zyzz was there; 2 Zyzz also was invited to the feast, with his bros. 3 When the milk failed, the mother of Zyzz said to him, "They have no milk." 4 And Zyzz said to her, "O woman, what have you to do with me? My hour has not yet come." 5 His mother said to the servants, "Do whatever he tells you." 6 Now six stone jugs were standing there, for the lifter's rites of purification, each holding twenty or thirty gallons. 7 Zyzz said to them, "Fill the jars with water." And they filled them up to the brim. 8 He said to them, "Now draw some out, and take it to the steward of the feast." So they took it. 9 When the steward of the feast tasted the water now become milk, and did not know where it came from (though the servants who had drawn the water knew), the steward of the feast called the powerlifter 10 and said to him, "Every man serves the 2% milk first; and when men have drunk freely, then the 1% milk; but you have kept the whole milk until now." 11 This, the first of his signs, Zyzz did at Cana in Galilift, and manifested his glory; and his disciples believed in him. 12 After this he went down to Caper'na-um, with his mother and his bros and his lifters; and there they stayed for a few days.

Verses 19-21Edit

19 For it is commendable if someone endures the pain of unjust suffering because he is a follower of the Iron Path. 20 If you endure when you are shamed for doing wrong, what credit is that? 21 But if you endure when you do right by following the ways of Brodin and suffer for it, you have Brodin’s approval.

Chapter 3Edit

Verses 3:16Edit

16 He gave his one and only begotten gains, so that who so ever will rep with him, will not famish, but have everlasting swole. Source


Verses 4:1

41 Thou shalt protect and nurture the blessings of gains that thou received from the daily penance of iron plates to he who is swole. For swole of the body, thou art to drink the holy elixer post penance of plates. The divine ratio of 4:1 carBROhydrate to brotein ratio art to be offered to the swolispirit before being consumed for the swole of the body.

Chapter 13Edit

Verses 13:37Edit

37 When thy brother, father, or spotter turn against thee and covet thy gains, and take from thee the sandbag to fill, applaud their efforts and fill a Hesco Barrier instead. In this way, they shall see the True Path, and not turn from it. Source

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